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Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Day 16: Set backs and sailboats

My boat had been docked. It had been held down with an anchor but then the storm came through. I weathered the storm as best as I could rocking around and being tossed by the waves because I didn't anchor it properly. I didn't give my anchor the care and protection it needed and it came loose. The worst part is I tried to deny that I didn't anchor it properly and got blown out to sea.
Now I am fighting to stay afloat and not drown. Part of me wants to just dive in and see if I drown or not. That's the satanic part of me. The other part, the good part, is trying to stay on board and get back to dock. Jumping would be easier, wouldn't it? Throwing all caution to the wind seems easier but I know the end result would be disastrous. If I was lucky enough to survive, I wouldn't have anything to return to. My boat will have sailed without me. I'd be standing on shore alone. I often wonder if that would be so terrible. I've always been somewhat of a loner even though I'm an extrovert. However, I wouldn't just be alone. I'd be stranded with no one to get me off the island. I just can't figure out how to stay afloat and get back to the dock on my own without "being watched". How do you stay afloat?

Isaiah 41:10

fear not, for I am with you;
be not dismayed, for I am your God;
I will strengthen you, I will help you,
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

1 comment:

  1. I know this is a while after you wrote, but I have been reading your blog and appreciate the road you are on. I write as a Lutheran pastor, husband, grandfather, and a sinner.

    One great insight into Scriptures is that we are 100% sinner and 100% saint (Romans 7 dilemma). The battle of our lives involves which one we feed. God’s Word and the Lord’s Supper, plus confession/absolution are the tools that God uses to feed us, forgive us, restore us, renew us, strengthen us, comfort us, and encourage us.

    God’s richest blessings through Christ who gives us the victory!